April 2017
"celebritas" - 4/15/17
I had a dream last night where it 
was shown to me that success is the right
to say yes but the privilege of saying no
I was hanging out with Patti Smith
someone on her team was running 
a collaboration by her it was for some
awards ceremony or other the other artist
was very hot but she didn't hesitate 
shaking her head and rolling her eyes
"not for me" then she dove back into
our conversation eyes aglow with the 
energy of someone who knows exactly
who she is who she is not where she shines
and where her fierceness might be at risk
of flickering out success is the privilege of saying no
sometimes waking up from"celebrity dreams"
I feel a profound sense of loss that I missed my 
chance to ask the right questions and learn
some ephemeral truth from a master or mistress
of truth, art, whatever their specialty may be
the fact remains I already know exactly what 
I want them to say to me I want them to say
you are worthy you're ok someday you'll have 
created something meaningful enough 
to have earned a place in someone else's
dream reckoning with my own insecurity
I lie awake wondering what my swan song will be